Exchange Surgery Date Set
Today was a good day, I finally booked my next surgery. You would be surprised to know how joyful and giddy I was to get a date scheduled for my new foobs! November 30th I will once again head into the operating room. This time I hope for a speedy recovery and some squishy girls rather than these rocks I have now.
So I was M.I.A. for three months, as the dust has settled and life slows down again I am back checking on my fellow blogger I have met over the past few months. One in particular was on my heart last night as I was writing.
I found this mom by accident, I am not sure how I came across her blog but I happened to find her as she just signed up for hospice care. Hospice care, the beginning of the end. I was immediately drawn into her world, looking at her beautiful photos of all of her kids, looking how beautiful she was before the cancer got her. Then finding her more beautiful after reading her journey.
I commented on her blog, telling her simply that I find her brave and amazing. She was facing death head on and finding peace in her soon to be departure. We not only had a bond of breast cancer but we both are called Amber.
A few days later I saw that she had posted on my own blog. Her words moved me to tears, because I thought why would she waist any precious moments writing me. She was near the end, and she chose to take a minute to encourage me? I am the lucky one, I am still here, I am as of this moment cancer free. The tears began to flow, and Amber has always been in the back of my mind.
I realized on my “me-cation” that I needed to take a break from the cancer world that I had created or that in reality found me. I needed this break to heal and to learn how to stop looking behind me but to look forward with anticipation of greatness.
However over the past two weeks I feel my cancer world calling me back. Not to dwell on the sadness, and it is sad overwhelmingly sad. But to support you all going through this terrible cancer now. To never forget what cancer is and what cancer does. Your stories, your blogs touch my life. I could never just walk away from all that I have learned, but all of your experiences.
I have sort of a uniform now, I wear two bracelet’s daily. One is a metal bracelet with an inscription written on it. “What cancer cannot do, -steal eternal life-kill friendship-conquer the spirit-suppress memories-cripple love-corrode faith-destroy peace-invade the soul-silence courage.”
Another is a soft pink colored bracelet. These two items remind me daily of my journey and of others journeys.
So tonight, I am thinking of you Amber…. I was so sad to find you had past a couple of weeks ago. You have found peace, now I will think of your kids and your husband may they find peace and comfort knowing that you are no longer in pain. But I am so sorry…. I am so, so sorry to find you are gone…. thank you for reaching out to me and encouraging me! Tonight I remember you…