Dear Future Client,
Yes, I get it, I’m supposed to have my professional bio right here. With all my stats and why you should hire me. Well guess what? I’ve unveiled my mask and I really want to just talk with you first. Share with you my story in a nutshell. I haven’t had an easy life, that’s for sure. But who of us have really? We all have our own unique story to tell, challenges we’ve overcome and triumphs that will forever be engrained on our hearts. For me, this journey here on this earth has been both physically and emotionally challenging.
This is my coming out moment. This letter is my first acknowledgment publicly of the life I have lived for over twenty years. You see, I hid behind my mask, just as you may be doing right now. It’s easy to live behind it, especially now with social media. We all must look adorable at all times; our food is staged (yeah I’m guilty) and the smiles are wide and bright on our faces while on the inside we feel as though were dying, because the act we’ve been trying to keep up has made us loose site of who we truly are and who we were really meant to be.
Here is my truth… are you ready? Or maybe should I say am I ready? I was in an emotionally, sexually and physically abusive relationship with what I believe a malignant narcissist. OMG, did I really just type this? To be honest, my heart is racing, but I know, like I really, really know that it’s my time. I can’t stay quiet anymore. But damn, it’s hard to admit this. You see I had a mask on for a very long time. I smiled in the photos, I entertained friends, I tried to be the best mom I could be in that situation, I tried to shield them but truly I was a liar.. like a big-time liar! To everyone… but most importantly to my four beautiful children. I was a fake, because I tried my damndest for all those years to protect the one who was destroying me to my core. I stayed quiet, and I kept busy, like SO Busy! You know why? I didn’t want to face it, I didn’t want to feel the pain I was in. Here is another honest truth… I allowed it to happen, me yes me until finally I didn’t let it anymore! I wanted to survive and thrive and I knew the only way to truly do this was to walk away from my marriage.
Emotional abuse is so traumatic and so very hard to explain. The cycle of narcissist abuse can actually change brain chemistry. When living in flight mode most of the time, and not feeling my emotions my body did it for me, it acted out. At thirty-one I was diagnosed with breast cancer, no family history. Then a few years later I had to go on heart meds because my heart was a mess from stress. I could barely get groceries because I was so weak and sick. You know why??? I was hiding behind my mask, I was living a lie. I was being emotionally abused behind closed walls, yet my act was that I had it all together, I was accomplishing things, I was volunteering I was running my businesses. But….. I was dying on the inside! My true self is not a liar, actually I’m probably one of the most transparent people you may meet. But this, was the biggest secret of my life, I didn’t want anyone to know that this was my life. I also didn’t even understand the grasp of what I had lived in for almost twenty years until a few months ago. When you’re in the cycle, it’s your normal it’s what you’re used to.
You see I am you, we all have our secrets, we are having things we must overcome. We all have dreams and we all want to be authentically us… just as we are. We don’t want to wear the mask anymore, we don’t’ want to hide. Here’s the deal, I’ve realized recently if I continue to stay quiet this. Horrible cycle can repeat, others will stay quiet too. We can’t stay quiet any longer. I am here to encourage you, and to hold your hand as you begin to create the life you’ve always dreamed of.
Am I scared? Hell YES! I just wrote something publicly I’ve been hiding my entire adult life. I now feel like my greater purpose is to help you get out. To help you achieve your goals and be financially able to leave if you need to. My greater purpose is to see you succeed in the business world whether it’s opening your own school or something else. My soul is guiding the way now, my intuition is my guide. Let’s unveil your mask and no longer hide but thrive in this life!